Change is something we’ve all experienced. Whether this change was voluntarily or involuntarily. As the season transitions from Summer to Fall, we experience the dynamics of change taking place all around us.
When it comes to making a voluntary effort toward changed behavior, one of the most important aspects of this process is in the doing. We can wish, hope, and pray but if we don’t ‘ᴅᴏ’, nothing will change.
Below is a model that is used in psychology to illustrate the steps toward bringing about effective change in our lives. Change happens in 5 stages:
Stage 1. Pre-Contemplation - no intent to change.
Stage 2. Contemplation - aware a problem exists, but no commitment to action.
Stage 3. Preparation - intending to take action toward change.
Stage 4. Action - actively modifying what needs to be changed through effort.
Stage 5. Maintenance - sustained change; new behavior or habit is maintained and replaces the old.
Relapse - moving back into old pattern/behavior.
Over the years that I have counseled individuals using Astrology, I have found that many people find themselves in the Contemplation stage of change. They are aware a problem exists (usually the reason why they have scheduled a reading), but they have not committed to taking action just yet.
Change can be challenging because we’re looking to work against momentum and move in a new direction. Have you ever tried to bring a car going 90 mph to a complete stop in order to make a turn? You know it doesn’t happen immediately because energy has been built up to propel the car in a certain direction. To come to a complete stop and go in another direction requires momentum to be broken and redirected. That is what we are doing inside of us as we work to bring about change in our lives.
Fear, I have found, is usually at the root of staying in the Contemplation stage of change. Fear of leaving one’s comfort zone, fear of separating from someone, fear of being ostracized by friends, family, or community, fear of confrontation, fear of failing, fear of relapsing - so much fear. This fear has its nuances, but the common denominator is fear itself.
As we build up the momentum to make a change, it is important to be honest with ourselves about why we may be stagnant in the process. Change doesn’t happen by accident. It is intentional, and sometimes, the breakthrough we need is in the truths we avoid facing. Even if that truth is simply admitting we are afraid to be or experience different from what we have always known.